Monday, January 01, 2018

18 in 2018

As you all know, I love Gretchen Rubin, particularly her work about the four tendencies.  I am an upholder (I mean DUH) which means I can readily meet outer and inner expectations.  Why then, I wonder, do I have trouble over-eating?  Or sticking to some of my New Year's resolutions?

To try to answer this question, I decided to paw through my NYR archives to try to see which ones I kept and which ones I abandoned so I could set some realistic goals for myself. I realized that the resolutions I abandon are not things I actually want to do, and that right there is the problem.  I have been resolving to lose 20 pounds for the last 5 years, and NOPE.  Or, how about the publish in an academic journal goal?  NOPE.  It's goals like these that make me abandon all of the other ones, I think, because I am like well, you know what FOREGT ALL THIS WHOLE LIST.  LISTS ARE STUPID. Clearly, I am a person of extremes.

But, then, there are the goals I keep.

The past couple of years, for example, I have been resolving to take better care of my face, and I am totally doing it.  All year, I have been doing the popular-on-the-Internet 10-step skincare routine.  I do it almost every day, and I really really like it, especially because there's no set list of products you have to buy.  I can use cheap stuff, which is what I am most likely to replenish.  Duh.  Again.

I also floss now without needing to resolve to do it because I am a grown up.  Boom!

But the academic writing goal?  I DON'T WANT TO DO IT.  I think it is PTSD from my PhD.  I feel dumb and I don't even want to want to invest the time. So, no goal and no guilt in 2018.

I am also intrigued by the Happier Podcast's suggestion to have a list of 18 projects for 2018, so some of my resolutions are made in this spirit.  I like this idea because it makes resolutions more than thou-shalt-nots and because it lets me incorporate a mix of ongoing projects and things I can cross off my list, and you know I love nothing more than crossing things off lists.

2018 Resolutions:

1.  Blog everyday.  In a perfect world, I will actually have a damn post up for every day of the year, even if it means I write like 7 in a row and back date them, but I hope I will write everyday.  Big goals.

2.  No Facebook between 9-5 M-F.  NO EXCEPTIONS.

3.  100 books in 2018.

4.  Read poetry.  I want to say everyday, but I feel like that might not happen.  I want to make a habit of reading poetry on the regular, whatever that shapes up to look like.  I had a poetry minor in college.  I used to BE a poet.  I want poetry back in my daily life, you know?

5.  Learn how to set a beautiful table.  This might be a multi-year goal because I have never prioritized table setting really, and I don't have a lot of pretty things.  But!  2018 is the year I will start the process.

6.  Figure out what's going to happen in my book and then make it happen.

7.  Print the GD pictures already.  It has been YEARS.  I swear to you all that this is the year I choose the best 30 every month and just freaking PRINT THEM ALREADY.

8.  Track the spending.  I deal with money by pretending that it doesn't exist.  Like, if I wanted to log into my bank account right now, I would not be able to.  Well, you guys.  That ends NOW.  I am going to know where every single penny goes all year long, and in December?  I am going to have a shitload of extra pennies sitting around.  Like #5, I feel like this may take a few years.

9. Post-a-day on Insta and also 1 SE.

10.  Have a dinner party, like, a real grown up one.

11. Let the kids entertain more at our house.

12.  Write poetry.  I'd like to say a poem a day, but that seems really ambitious.

13. Volunteer for candidates I care about in the 2018 election cycle.

14.  Clean out my closet and maintain it as a pleasant, moderately organized space all year.  THIS IS SO HARD.

15.  Keep family movie Friday going all year-- we all love it.

16.  Paint the downstairs and make over the downstairs bathroom.  I'd like to install a urinal in there because seriously, but that seems a little unlikely. For this year.

17.  Focus on having harmonious mornings.  I don't need to check Harry's learning management system and nag him about missing work when he's on his way to school.  I can just send him an email reminder.  I don't need to get upset when the kids fight before school or can't find their hats and gloves, etc.  Instead, I need to manage my expectations and do more to prepare ahead of time.

18.  More date nights!  We have slacked on this and tend to treat vegging on the couch after the kids go to bed as date nights.  But!  This year, we will get out more with just each other.  What a fun resolution!

So, tell me what you're resolving to do in the new year!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Sarah, I love your blog and listen to your podcast and always enjoy what you have to say about your week/family/being a working mom. Do you mind if I ask for a detailed blog about your face clean routine? I went into the website and I am intrigue!, what products do you use? how often do you exfoliate? how much did you spend on all the products? can I skip some of the steps? thanks! Martha