Thursday, November 26, 2015

Really really really really really fun Thanksgiving

We have had SO MUCH FUN so far this long weekend.  I think it's because our kids have finally reached the age where they can get off their schedules and not be huge cranky assholes.  Although the nap Dorothy took during The Good Dinosaur probably helped.  (I stayed at my parents/ house and cooked with my mom, which I think was better than the movie).

Anyway, we kicked off the trip with pizza at my all time favorite pizza place, the place where my friends and I went after every junior high dance.
Then we kept the junior high vibe alive and went to the ROLLER RINK!  And we made all the kids get old school skates instead of blades and had a total blast.

After we put all the kids to bed, Ben and I went to my favorite bar from back in the day for a quick drink:

We did our best to wear the kids out all morning and took advantage of the weather with 2 park trips and a front yard football game

And then today was full of cute cousins and perfect food.  I am full of vodka, champagne, cookies, cheesecake, and a million other staples.  I have more pics than the ones below, but my phone died because I am so addicted to 2048.  But still, we had an awesome Thanksgiving, and I hope you did, too:

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Exemplary Turkeys

I went to Jack's class to throw a second grade harvest party, and at his teacher's request, I prepped an activity. I chose one that's always a hit with my kids: making turkey hats. 

But of course the whole thing was a cluster fuck. 

In between meeting with students anxious about their upcoming research papers, I spent my office hours cutting out templates for the body, feathers, beak, and wattle and putting them in individual baggies along with small squares of red and orange paper for the wattle and beak and black and white paper to make eyes. I figured I would get to school a few minutes early and use the paper cutter to slice some bright colored paper into smaller pieces so the kids could have an easier time cutting out feathers, but first,  I should quarter some brown paper and put in the template bags, so they could cut out turkey bodies. And that's when I discovered that the construction paper I bought had no brown. What the hell? Isn't that a standard color? I ended up having to go to the teacher supply store for freaking brown paper.  

And? Remember the Rice Krispie turkey legs I stayed up late among? Nobody cared about them because parents sent in a bunch of store bought cookies and a cookie cake. Which is why we have a TREAT SIGN UP.  

Anyway, the hat above? Ben stapled to my head while I hid from the babies in the laundry room and readied the last of my supplies. The kids kept calling it the example turkey, which is still cracking me up. 

They turkey hats were such a hit that while Jack was at practice, the rest of the kids made them, too. 
I am actually going to be really sad when we don't need example turkeys anymore. 

Tuesday, November 24, 2015


When I say "Oh, I was meaning to blog today,but.."  I really mean it.  I HAVE been meaning to blog, but my days get away from me and before I know it, it's midnight and I am still making fucking Rice Krispie turkey legs.  I have even been taking a million pictures everyday WITH THE INTENTION of blogging them.  

So, real quick before I collapse from exhaustion, lemme show you the SNOW.

The children woke us up bright and early on Saturday morning because SNOW!  THERE IS SO MUCH SNOW!

They couldn't wait to go play in it.  Harry and Jack wouldn't even pose for a picture, and even Cooper scrambled outside without freaking out about having to wear socks.

 And then we had hockey.
 The boys and I grabbed some snacks, pitched a tent in the fmaily room, and read 75 pages of Auggie and Me. 
 The next day= MOAR HOCKEY
 And a quick family skate.
 Which wore Dorothy right out.
 Like, seriously.
 As soon as the boys went to school on Monday, the little kids demanded that we go back outside.
 It was warm enough to walk to the park but snow park made Dorothy feel grumpy.
I totally feel the same way because snow means SO MUCH STUFF to keep track of.  I was in Jack's class today for a harvest party, and I felt bad for the second graders who seemed a little overwhelmed with the sudden addition of snow pants, boots, hats, mittens, etc.  Just last week it was warm enough to go to school with just a fleece, and now!  Now we're in full-on winter mode.

At least there's sledding:

Monday, November 23, 2015

iPad Overload

Before we went on vacation, I loaded up all 4 iPads with EXACTLY the same content.  And you know what?  The kids STILL fought over them.

So tonight, I have spent 2 frustrating hours erasing them all and customizing the sneuxflakes' options in anticipation of our (hopefully) quick drive to my parents' on Wednesday.

Harry just has Minecraft, a couple of football games, Five Nights at Freddy's, Angry Birds, and his school's library app that allows him to check out books from school and our city library system.  He also has a ton of podcasts and his ear buds.

Jack has all those games plus a host of LEGO games and some of the pretend games the babies love like Pet Salon and My Play Home and some math facts games.

Cooper likes FNAF, Angry Birds, and Minecraft, in addition to Bits Board, recommended by his speech therapist, and some licensed character games.

Dorothy LOVES the character games, as well as coloring pages, alphabet games, and all of the Frozen apps she can fit on a screen.

And I?  AM TOTALLY SICK OF MESSING WITH THE KIDS' IPADS. (I also took them all to the library after school, so everyone has fresh books, too).

Sunday, November 22, 2015

I WANT to blog...

... But I am making these and I have 34 to go:

Saturday, November 21, 2015

Christmas kickoff party

We went to an excellent Christmas kickoff party last night with a gag gift exchange.  This was our contribution:
 It wasn't an ugly sweater party, but we wore them anyway.  Which, I have to tell you, made dinner beforehand kind of awkward.
 It was a wonderful party, complete with awesome fireworks outside during the first snowfall of the season, which put everyone in a holiday mood.
 And every time I asked Ben to take a picture of me and friends, he did this instead:
There was also a totally hilarious lip sync contest, and Ben sang this totally vulgar Tenacious D song, only no one had ever heard this song or was at all familiar with Tenacious D and I think they thought it was a like supposed to be a for serious song, and it's obviously not.  So, that was awkward. And even funnier than Shittens.  But maybe not funnier than the Shittens Amazon reviews.  You're welcome.

Friday, November 20, 2015

Life today

 Cooper had homework and was pretty excited about it.  He's studying firefighters, and he had to walk through our house and find all of our fire safety tools.  He was super excited to have homework.

I also spent $1 at target on some glittery Christmas stickers, and they kept him busy for 26 minutes.  #winning.
 Dorothy played with the Funfetti frosting container for about the same amount of time.  Have you ever read the ingredients on that stuff?  DON'T.
 OMG.  After living in a totally bare room for YEARS, we bought tables like a year ago.  And now we have PUT THINGS ON THEM.  We suck so hard at decorating.  But look!  Lamps!

 It's like we're almost grownups.

OMG again-- we totally lost Dorothy yesterday afternoon.  NO ONE knew where she was!  We were freaking out, wondering if we heard the alarm go off (it beeps whenever anyone opens the door which is annoying, but if we have toddlers that we sometimes lose, we need the beeps).

Finally, we found her:

 Ready for practice (LOL)
 We took Jack to Cub Scouts last night, and Cooper sneaked his paci in his pocket.  he was super proud of himself.
 Cooper was the only kid up for more than an hour this morning, and he helped me make tube cinnamon rolls (we are on a nutritional roll, obvi).

 He totes loved them:
 Lady Mary Ben took to his bed to grade papers.
 What a coincidence!  I AM ALSO THANKFUL SHE'S A GIRL. #feminism
 We are getting a huge snow storm tonight, and I scrambled to make sure everyone has appropriate winter wear
 She likes to play pantsless with Boots and Dora on her bookshelf.  But who doesn't?