Sunday, November 16, 2008

Shopping Psychosis and Jack's 7 Month Birthday



Can I just tell you how much dissonance the Gap Friends and Family coupon has been causing me? I have a HUGE problem with coupons-- I feel like I MUST redeem them and buy tons of crap I don't need (which, I understand, is the whole point right?). I went to BabyGap on Friday because Harry keeps outgrowing all his clothes, and I used my re-usable coupon very responsibly, buying a ton of stuff I would have bought anyway. Nice work, right? WRONG. That stupid slip of paper (because I printed it straight from my email-- and then printed like 3 more copies because I was afraid I would lose it) practically burned a whole on my diaper bag.

On the way to the grocery store, I had to run into Old Navy because 30% off-- how could I resist? I ended up coming to my senses somewhere in the middle of a display of fleece pants and abandoned my stroller cart (but how could I pass up a $7.99 cardigan for Harry-- 30% off eight bucks is like 2 and half dollars, for goodness sake-- also I did that math in my head instantaneously because I am the best sale shopper evah).

But then, after dinner (stuffed salmon, a baby green salad, baked potatoes, and fresh green beans-- all prepared by the best husband in the world), I dragged us all to the mall where I moped around Banana and tried really hard to like something so I could get 30% off of it. (I did like a few things, but I lack the grown up life that goes with them. Where the hell am I going to wear a satin babydoll dress? How the heck would I nurse in my chic little sweater mini? How many diapers could I cram inside an envelope clutch?)

Then I made us all go to the BigPeopleGap, where I again found myself in line with an armful of random crap that I sort of liked, so strong was my desire to reuse my coupon. I was literally the next person in line when I noticed that I grabbed the wrong size black cami. Then I remembered that I live in Wisconsin and would have to bury that cami under so many layers of wool, fleece, and flannel, it will be invisible until July, at which time it will no longer fit because I will be eating all winter in an attempt to coat my body with some insulating blubber.

So I left the line and told Ben, who was trying to retrieve Jack's teething toy, cram the fleece liner back into Harry's kicked-off Croc, and stop Harry's toes from connecting with Jack' eyes (hmmm, maybe that side-by-side stroller was a dumb idea after all) that I was just buying this stuff because I had a coupon and we should just go home.

"Because nobody needs 6 cans of light Progresso soup-- it's not worth the fifty cents off!" he screamed, in what would appear to the casual observer to be a non sequitur, but he has been harboring a lot of aggression at my coupon-induced shopping binges, I guess.

I went home and made a gross of cookies, in the spirit of excess

Harry donned boxes for shoes and was all, "You need to use coupon at Piper Lime, mama." He's no help.

I love a man with dishpan hands

Jack is 7 months old today. Time flies when you never sleep. It feels like only one long day ago that he was born.

(and that's where the psychosis part of the title comes into play)

Also, I think you can see his teeth in a couple of these. What you can't see? How bad he wants to crawl and the screams he emits when he tries to move forward and ends up scooting backwards instead.

9 comments:

Nickelodeon Nation said...

Oh man. That coupon is awesome (got a bunch of Xmas gifts and whatnot super cheap) and dangerous (this afternoon, I'm going to Old Navy for the third time in as many days).

I feel your pain. I totally did the, "Why am I buying this? Yes, it is only $2.50, but...I don't really need it or like it that much and have a huge closet packed with clothes." I, too, have shopping psychosis. Dangerous.

Erin said...

Argh! For some dumb reason, Blogger keeps labeling my blog comments across the web as "Nickelodeon Nation" even though I am, in fact, not that excellent tome. I knew I never should've saved it to my Google books library. Anyway. It's Erin Smith, not Nickelodeon Nation.

Becca said...

I just ate a stack of cookies that looked about like that.

I almost wept with joy the first time I bought a dress that was not a wrap dress and was totally impractical for nursing after Charlie stopped needing it during the day. I only got to wear it for about two months but what can you do?

Satin babydoll dress sounds fantastic! You would totally be taken seriously if you taught in that!!

AJU5's Mom said...

Those cookies look good! I am having a huge sweet tooth - maybe it is my way of surviving the lack of sleep?

Anonymous said...

your shopping problems are generational, from great-great-grandma on down...sorry..that's really okay though, those little boys are so cute they should have everything (you two too) Bomma

Tripod said...

These are some of the best pix of Jack EVER. He looks so proud and happy!
Can't wait to see them.

sarah said...

I love your neuroses.

WHO eats all those cookies? You are thin, Ben is thin. If I baked all those cookies, Husband & I would be on the Biggest Loser next season.

I often find myself wishing I lived closer to you, (and I mean that in as non-stalkerish way as possible), but if you're always baking like that, it's probably best that 2500 miles separate us.

Lucy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lucy said...

Hmmm...can we have a 105 meeting on thursday just to eat some of those cookies? Now, more seriously, that second-to-last picture of Jack is ADORABLE.

-Rachel
(sorry about the deleted comment - I, like Erin, seem to have difficultly getting google to allow me to identify myself.)